Totem the feel good game – Team Building, Therapy Games for Teens, Family Games for Kids and Adults, Counseling Activities, Boost Mindfulness, Social Emotional Skills and Self-Esteem

I’m a clinical social worker in private practice working mostly with children, teens, and young adults. This game is wonderful for building a therapeutic alliance with kids, reinforcing psychological concepts and coping strategies, exploring issues, and building self esteem. While the game was intended for group play, I use it in individual therapy with kids in a number of different ways that help children to identify their own strengths and weaknesses. The game often ends up becoming a springboard for children to talk about the things that challenge them in a way that feels safe and fun. The game also provides an opportunity for children to see how attributes are not “all or none” and how our “gifts” can sometimes be to our detriment when not in moderation (i.e. one card says “I do things with precision”). I play the game by dealing 7 cards to both myself and the child and then ask them to put them in order face down in the order most to least relevant for them (or, what they think apply to me if it’s a child I know well). Then we turn over one card at a time and discuss why we picked it, giving examples of how the attribute fits or doesn’t fit us. Sometimes we swap cards when it seems to fit better for the other person. Sometimes I place the cards in order for the child the way I think they might do it and then they correct it and we see how many I got right. I let them do the same for me. In the end, I have kids pick 9 cards that were most relevant to them, place them in a 3 x 3 grid, and take a picture with their smartphone as a reminder of their “gifts”. Please note, the words used in the deck of cards to describe traits and attributes are, for the most part, too advanced for elementary school-age children, so the game is used for my middle and high school kids. Even these children will sometimes not know the meaning of a word, so I will either tell them or let them google it for a definition. I have contacted the company and suggested they make a “junior” version and hope they soon will! I have many games in the office and this is, hands down, one of my favorite.

This game is so fun and uplifting. Love having it in my therapy space.

Totem is an amazing game which promotes self affirmation and self realization from different peoples perspective. Although I’ve played it with adults my favorite use is with my students in our social emotional learning class. There are many adaptations you can use with the game to build self-confidence, Self-awareness, and perspective. I was not going to buy it due to the cost but I’ve already used it multiple times in two weeks. It’s small so it can go in a travel bag, purse, backpack etc. and very accommodating to any space to play. It is a giftable game which I can see even young adults embracing. The directions are easy to follow and everyone leaves feeling very good about themselves! The game can be played in long or short sessions. It lends itself to adaptability so I have even used it By playing one round each day. Not only does it give you self affirmations through the other people playing but it also allows you to show them things that you recognize in a positive way also.

We enjoyed the conversation that was sparked by sharing. The idea of rating the cards, most to least had little value. Guessing who said what might be more fun. I like it as a conversation starter but it's not really a game. I bought this for a disabled adult - it's not as powerful due to the need to understand concepts and have a larger vocabulary. Cards are nice quality and if you, family and friends are open to conversation this is a lovely way to engage. I really like the concept of telling people what you like about them.

I purchased this because I was researching games for my classroom to build community. I decided to try it out with my family. This is such a wonderful game. We pick out an animal that represents the dealer. It took a bit of convincing to my animal lover daughter that she shouldn't pick her favorite animal but the one that represents the dealer :) Then we get to talk about the wonderful things associated with the dealer and their positive traits. And you get to do it again with the second set of cards. When it was my turn to be the dealer I had to hold back the tears!Totem provides a structured and safe way to share compliments. It's not an wide open field. Because you have to select from 7 cards, it gives you boundaries and helps focus your thoughts about a person. I can tell you that my 7 year old son was better able to give positive comments about his sister using this game than he ever has. It wasn't a general "you're nice" or "I like your shirt." He was able to articulate "I think you're like a whale because even when I'm having a hard time you can be calm and help me through it." I was BLOWN AWAY!The kids keep asking to play the game every day and love to call each other by their given totem. Best purchase for our family in a long time! I'm very excited to try this out with my classroom throughout the year and will continue to love playing it with my family. Buy it. You won't be disappointed.

I have used this game a lot with my skills groups, and every single time, they leave feeling good! Even my participants who tend to think these things are corny really love this game. It's a must have for teams. 100% worth the investment - thanks for making this deck!

Loved the idea of this, actually playing it with ages 9, 11, 13, 14 & another adult, it was too tedious & slow moving. By the time about the 3rd player made their totem everybody was bored.It would have been WAY more fun if there were actual totem-building playing pieces to make a real totem pole.Love the idea, but took too long & moved too slowly with several players.